52 Films by Women Vol 9. 36. Die My Love (Director: Lynne Ramsay)

 


Pictured: The couple Grace (Jennifer Lawrence) and Jackson (Robert Pattinson) celebrate their child's first six months in a scene from the film, 'Die My Love', adapted from Ariana Harwicz's 2017 novel by co-writers Alice Birch, Enda Walsh and co-writer-director Lynne Ramsay. Still courtesy of Mubi (photo credit: Kimberley French)

Ariana Harwicz’s 2017 novel, Die My Love has been Americanized and brought to the screen by producer-star Jennifer Lawrence and co-writer-director Lynne Ramsay, via co-writers Alice Birch and Enda Walsh, as well as Martin Scorsese, whose Sikelia Productions is also involved. It is a tough watch, one hundred and eighteen minutes in the company of an unstable young mother, Grace (Lawrence), a writer who places her baby, boyfriend and herself in jeopardy. You watch it in a state of constant anxiety, clenching your buttocks and feel the need to change your underwear afterwards.

Harwicz’s novel is set in France. Ramsay’s film, shot by Seamus McGarvey, in Montana. Most of the action takes place in the dilapidated clapboard house into which Grace and her boyfriend Jackson (Robert Pattinson) move into, inherited from Jackson’s uncle, Frank, who shot himself. Grace questions Jackson’s mother, Pam (Sissy Spacek) and goes through various killer spots by process of elimination: head (no), chest or heart (no), don’t tell me, his ass (no response). In a flashback we meet Jackson’s father, Harry (Nick Nolte) who has dementia. He and Grace share a moment as she fetches him a drink. They both pull faces, positioning themselves as outsiders in cahoots, but then Harry sees where he is and hurls his glass against the wall. ‘This is my brother’s house! We shouldn’t be here.’ I guess that’s why they call the wine, ‘Shard donnez.’ Someone has to fetch the broken pieces.

Ramsay’s debut, Ratcatcher, screened at the Cannes Film Festival in 1999. Die My Love is only her fifth feature. Her films are defined by brittle characters and brutal outlooks. Her leading actors – Samantha Morton (Morvern Callar), Tilda Swinton (We Need To Talk About Kevin), Joaquin Phoenix (You Were Never Really Here) and now Jennifer Lawrence – go to the edge, where behaviour expunges personality. Ramsay’s characters are like automations that pull the plug and keep walking. Ramsay has in the past proved reluctant to talk about her work, as if each film were a skin that she has shed. She is concerned with mental health but is reluctant to pigeonhole her characters’ psychosis. In the case of Die My Love’s Grace, she does not attribute her behaviour solely to post partem depression. Violent behaviour – as illustrated by Harry – is as much a form of protest, a demand to live life in a more appropriate way. Ramsay judges the world not on ideological grounds or even through the lens of feminism. Her characters are consumed by a rage that has no gender. At the end of Die My Love, Grace runs metaphorically (at least) into the fire, a forest blaze of her own making, words (contained in her journal) lost to the world. I thought the final scene was of poor taste: a Hollywood star embracing flames by implication refusing to acknowledge the trauma caused by forest fires in California that consumed hundreds of homes at the start of 2025, affecting many in her community. Others will read the scene more generously.

Between 2012 and 2015, Lawrence was one of Hollywood’s most successful actresses. She headlined a high-grossing franchise (The Hunger Games and its three sequels) and earned critical kudos – and one Oscar - in three films directed by David O. Russell, Silver Linings Playbook, American Hustle and Joy. In those films, her characters fight for survival (or love) and succeed more through determination, empathy and resourcefulness than physical strength. In Die My Love, Lawrence negates the qualities that made her a star, a process that she began with her 2016 box-office flop, Passengers, in which her character was stranded on a space craft physically and metaphorically opposite Chris Pratt. In so doing, she shreds her ability to ‘open’ a picture.

In Die My Love, Lawrence (as Grace) initially occupies a space without imperatives. We see her stretching and dancing. The house into which the couple move is almost like a performance space. In the opening scene, Ramsay’s character is static as Grace and Jackson look into the house from outside, walk past the side wall and enter from a door we don’t see. Throughout their voice level is constant. We don’t get a sense of them getting closer to us. Indeed they don’t, for no sooner than they enter the room, they are walking away from the camera. The camera itself is indifferent to their movement. It doesn’t follow them, so when Jackson races upstairs to explore, he disappears from view. The opening establishes the house as an unresponsive environment that doesn’t reflect its new occupants. For a long period, the couple don’t personalise it. It doesn’t feature in their plans.

Outside the house, Jackson and Grace crawl on all fours, enacting a mating ritual of sorts. This scene tips into something else, the semblance of an advertising campaign for perfume. We understand that Jackson is a musician of sorts – he talks about getting a drum kit. Grace has pretensions of being a writer. Pregnancy and birth supplant ambitions. Then Grace slides. Crockery collects in the sink.

Just as the house is indifferent to Jackson and Grace, so Lawrence is indifferent to the camera. Having breastfed her baby, we see her standing up, one breast poking through her bra. Nudity is unsexualised, though Grace is consumed by desire. At one point, she lies on the bed in her underwear and masturbates. In another scene, after a drive, she tries to arouse Jackson outside his mother’s house. Jackson is mostly absent from the house working – we don’t know what he does, but we see him wearing a business branded tee-shirt in one scene. Grace is left alone with the baby, with only Pam to turn to.

When we first meet Pam, she has shotgun in hand. Grace takes the baby to see her, finds the key outside and calls out, climbing the stairs. She is greeted by two barrels. ‘You snuck in,’ complains Pam. ‘I didn’t,’ says Grace. Watching the two actresses, you reflect on their trajectories. Spacek achieved fame in her twenties playing the victimised student who exacts revenge through telekinesis in Carrie and won an Oscar as country singer Loretta Lynn in Coal Miner’s Daughter. A few more leading roles followed, but Spacek became a supporting actress and a touchstone of sorts, weathered by experience but always authentic. When Pam tells Grace that all mothers lose a sense of themselves after giving birth, we feel that she has survived that particular storm. Pam has her own condition. She sleepwalks with a shotgun in hand, waking up on a quiet road. We wonder how she unlocked the door while encumbered with a weapon.  One night, Grace creeps into the house and steals Pam’s shotgun for herself.

‘I got us a dog.’ ‘We needed a cat.’ Jackson and Grace don’t so much communicate as lay out their fait accompli. The dog that Jackson brings home barks constantly. It has the potential to threaten the baby. One day, Jackson shows it ‘a magic trick’, placing a bowl of mac and cheese powder (with added water) into the microwave, then feeding the cooked product to his pet. The dog becomes ill. It whimpers. Grace shakes Jackson conscious. ‘You have to put down your dog. It’s sick.’ ‘I’m not killing it,’ he replies. Grace takes the shotgun and blasts the canine. It is not the only wounded animal in the film. Whilst out driving, Grace finds a condom in Jackson’s glove compartment and inflates it, blocking his view of the road. Their car collides with a horse, which somehow walks away having damaged the vehicle’s fender. The incident doesn’t cure Grace of her erratic behaviour.

Purchasing the mac and cheese brings out the worst in Grace, who silences the perkiness of the shop assistant. She doesn’t want two for $6 or to be asked about her baby. She just wants to pay for her shopping. Playing a mother who can’t share her inner torment, Lawrence channels the aloof movie star who doesn’t engage. A party pooper. We see this when Grace, Jackson and the baby attend a party. Grace strips to her underwear and jumps in the children’s pool.


Pictured: 'We need a cat.' Grace (Jennifer Lawrence) struggles with her mental health in a scene from the film, 'Die My Love', adapted from Ariana Harwicz's 2017 novel by director Lynne Ramsay, who co-wrote the screenplay with Alice Birch and Enda Walsh. Still courtesy of Mubi. Photo credit: Kimberley French.

‘What are you doing?’ Grace asks Jackson on the phone. ‘I’m eating a burger,’ he tells her. ‘When will you be home?’ ‘Late.’ Grace imagines Jackson having sex with another woman. The car crash is motivated by her unfulfilled desire.

Grace appears to be stalked by a helmeted motorcycle rider in black leathers (Lakeith Stanfield). Eventually they meet in a barn. Grace bites his lip. Later, she sees him with a woman and child outside a supermarket and approaches. ‘Can you help me? I think my tyre is flat.’ ‘We ain’t going there,’ the woman says, immediately sensing a threat.

The film begins with a six-month party for the baby, Grace lamenting that the cake is shop bought. ‘I should have baked.’ It ends when the child is one. By then, Grace and Jackson have married, though their wedding is marred by Grace’s manic behaviour. She dances in a frenzy, then retires to the honeymoon suite where she pleads with the desk clerk to bring her some ice. He tells her to use the ice machine outside. She lures him to her room. Towards the end, Grace smashes her skull against a bathroom mirror and squeezes shampoos and lotions onto the floor. She has to be sectioned. She writes in a journal which has horses on the cover, recalling the early films of Eadweard Muybridge, not to mention the horse injured by Jackson’s car. Grace appears to have recovered the desire to write. The climax refutes this.


Pictured: No 'Mr Brightside.' Grace (Jennifer Lawrence, left) and Jackson (Robert Pattinson, right) dance at their wedding in a scene from co-writer-director Lynne Ramsay's film, 'Die My Love', adapted from Ariana Harwicz's 2017 by Ramsay and co-writers Alice Birch and Enda Walsh. Still courtesy of Mubi (photo credit: Kimberley French).

The uneasiness continues during a trip to the beach. McGarvey’s camera is pointed at the water, which reflects the sun and appears to blind Grace and Jackson. Three girls approach. ‘Do you mind if we play with your baby?’ one asks. Grace permits them to take the child. We wonder about their motivation and about Grace’s apathy.

While Lawrence dominates the film, Pattinson takes a back seat. Jackson broods but with no purpose, as if turning over a series of half-baked ideas in his mind. He is out of synch with Grace, tries to accommodate her but acts as if he too is weathering a storm.

‘I hate guitars,’ Grace tells Jackson, asking him to switch off the car radio. Later, she tells him she likes them. They sing along to a duet, ‘In Spite of Ourselves’ by John Prine and Iris DeMent (‘She don’t like her eggs all runny’, etc). It is a moment of respite. But not really. The new car. The house all fixed up. It’s no cure.

Reviewed at PictureHouse Central (Screen One), off Shaftesbury Avenue, Central London, Friday 7 November 2025, 12:40 screening

Comments

Popular posts from this blog

52 Films by Women Vol 9. 3. If I Had Legs I’d Kick You (Director: Mary Bronstein)

‘Superman’ Fan Event – Leicester Square, London, 2 July 2025

52 Films by Women Vol 9. 28. The Kidnapping of Arabella (Director: Carolina Cavalli)